Monday, April 7, 2014

How to feel empowered! (Fashion Blog Post)


"You look good. Now get away from that mirror, and make something of yourself."

My mom said to me. She got sick of seeing a perfectly capable young woman waste valuable time on a worthless reflection.

As a 15-year-old teen, feeling down about being chubby and having trouble being accepted in American high school, I spent way too long in front of the mirror that day, trying various outfits and makeup to look better.

Rolling my eyes at mom would have been the natural reaction.

Hormonal teenage girls are supposed to behave disrespectfully toward authority. But I didn't -- not because I was well-behaved, but because I knew she was right. And I took her advice obediently.

I got good grades that year. I'm not the brightest person, but worked my (chubby) behind off, and made straight A's at an academically-driven high school. Till this day I cannot shake the happiness I felt when I peeled the report card open. No amount of cute outfits, makeup or time in front of the mirror can make me feel as empowered.

Perhaps looking good empowers you? (It's okay to be vain.) But it doesn't empower you as much as the list below.


1. Talk less; do more.

Mother Teressa didn't bring hope to millions by gossiping with lady friends; Larry Page and Sergey Brin didn't create the baddest search engine by engaging in intellectual debates that make themselves look smart yet help no one.

The more you talk, the less you do. And no way can you feel empowered if you've nothing to show for all the time you spent babbling away.

2. Read educational text. On whatever you're interested in. Everyday.

Even if you're about to pass out. Just five minutes, or three, or two. Before lights go out.

3. Learn to say "NO."

I don't mean for you to become a selfish grudge, but please don't be a "yes-woman" either. Bending over backwards for everyone to trample on is a fast-track to low self esteem. It's also hard to separate enriching relationships from toxic ones.

Trust me! I was there a few years ago.

The more I said "yes," the more my so-called "friends" expected out of me, even though they gave next-to-nothing in return.

Please remember that all relationships require a two-way street. (Friendships, marriage, jobs...I'm talking ALL). And if you so willingly say "yes," make sure it's because you want to, and not because you feel obligated or desperate.

And by the way, if anyone imposes pressure or questions your whereabouts after you've refused, they needn't be in your life -- people should respect your decision, as well as your privacy.

4. Wear power jewelry.

Most of my jewelries do nothing but accessorize, but today I chose to wear ZALMO, the Wolf-Snake. It is from Kogayon, a European company I'm currently working with that makes "Exclusive Power-Jewelry" to empower others through mystic Transylvania symbols.

I chose ZALMO the Wolf-Snake, because it symbolizes "the protective power of success and intimidation of opponents." I may not be successful enough to have any opponents, but it feels good to have a goal :O)

Whatever your power symbol -- be it the Native American's eagle or the Chinese character for "strength" -- wear it! And let its power channel through.

5. Don a black blazer.

Ha! This is a fashion blog post after all.

There's something very commanding about basic black blazers. Though I don't know why. Perhaps it's because they're so sleek? Or because they dress up most outfits in an elegant, corporate way? Even with jeans, like today's pics, my black blazer delivered a surge of confidence.

Back to my high school story, if you don't mind.

Along with good grades, came acceptance. Even the popular kids began to notice.

This football jock -- the insanely good-looking, all-American type whom I wouldn't even dream of speaking to -- did poorly in Algebra 2. As soon as he found out that I made 100% on a test, he began sitting next to me, asking questions, getting acquainted...soon enough, his popular friends talked to me too.

I wasn't ever cool enough to sit at their table, but with their attention, I was no longer the "immigrant loner."

I'm sure you are already empowered.

But in case you ever feel down, like I did as a chubby 15-year-old, I hope the list above lifts you up.

Have a wonderful, fashionable day!

And don't forget to find more Power-Jewelry at

By the way, Kogayon is currently offering 20% off for all Girlie Blog readers in the US who orders for the first time. Just enter promotional code: KOG20GBS



  1. I wasn't the popular one in school either! So I can relate. Now when I look back, I laugh. I really wanted to be part of that group? Not now. Love that bracelet! It's so pretty.

  2. Beautiful Bracelet! Love this Post ,great one! <3


  3. I love a good post on empowerment. Congrats on working up the hard way and getting there. it's definitely not an easy job especially when trying to fit in.

  4. Great inspiration. I moved loads so it was never easy for me growing up. You must never be a "yes" anything other than having a "yes you can" do attitude to progress. :)/Madison

  5. This is such a lovely post :) There's nothing wrong with looking after your appearance but I agree that it's important to look after the inside too :) xx

  6. this is what i try to tell my do her own thing, be her own person. kids are so afraid to be labeled as the "nerd" and that is so frustrating to me...that she wouldn't do her best for fear of being teased. you can't go wrong with the classic black blazer. i really need an updated one.

  7. Amazing post! Talk less, do more set my mind racing since I'm very lazy :P

    Love Nilu Yuleena,
    BIG hair LOUD mouth BLOG
    BIG hair LOUD mouth FACEBOOK page

  8. You look gorgeous! I always say that pretty is as pretty does, you are such a good example of that!

  9. Amen sister!! Talk more!! Beauty is skin deep and what you make of your life and your accomplishments will end up radiating from inside!! You look adorable!!

  10. Love how you accessorized your outfit. The necklace and bracelets are gorgeous.
    If you have a second, I'd love for you to stop by and check out my latest post.

  11. Great post and it is absolutely true! You look so sharp in this outfit too. Visit my blog if you have a chance; Classy Pam is back :)

    Hugs and Kisses,

  12. Adorable! xx

  13. I love a sleek, black blazer too, especially with jeans. Your mom had sound advice and you were wise to recognize it as a teenager. I wanted to fit in as well in high school, but looking back, it wasn't "all that." I'm glad high school wasn't the pinnacle of my success. It would be all downhill after that!

  14. you look too good

    Will you like to follow each other?
    Sandy Sandhu

  15. thank you for sharing this story and being so relatable! you look amazing as always and such an inspiration. ps//i'm a fan of the black blazer too;)


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